第四八章 嘲戏更绝伦
笔趣阁(biquge321.com)更新快,无弹窗!
吃到向晚,宋江便借口明日还要早行,和两个公人共同歇宿去了。
酒席一散,西门庆便回到后寨自己家中,派玳安请来武大郎、唐牛儿,笑道:“大哥,牛儿兄弟,今日有宋江宋公明来到山寨,你们也听说了罢?怎样,想不想见他一见?”
唐牛儿先道:“星主大官人休怪我说,宋江那等腌臜伪君子,小人若见他时,只怕就要跳起来劈头掴他的逼脸!那时小人碎尸万段不打紧,却须连累了星主大官人!宋公明这黑厮,我还是不见的好!”
武大郎问道:“兄弟,你因何说,想要让我去见这宋公明?我早听牛儿兄弟说了,这宋公明言清行浊,不是个正路人物。见这种人,不如我多做几个供神的炊饼。”
西门庆笑道:“大哥你休要忘了,二哥在沧州柴进庄上时,曾受过这宋江的恩,因此和这宋江结拜了兄弟。”
武大郎便叹道:“那个不成器的东西!吃人家三言两语一挑唆,甚么事做不出来?他那性子,只怕吃那等小人卖了,还在替人数钱呢!”
西门庆便道:“就在刚才酒席上,我听刘唐兄弟略提了一句,说那宋江去年十一月间,曾在白虎山孔家庄上见过二哥一面,因此我才想要约了大哥,去向那宋公明问一问二哥的近况。”
武大郎终究是记挂着兄弟,一听此言,便跳起身说道:“既如此,纵然不情愿,也要去走一遭儿了!”
西门庆转头对唐牛儿道:“牛儿兄弟,你的状况,我也对那宋江说了,他知道你在这梁山之上,若今**不去他那里走走,只怕那等小人日后作祟起来,有些麻烦!”
唐牛儿躇踌道:“我见了那伪君子时,若管不住自己变眉变眼起来,岂不是给星主大官人招祸?”
西门庆便笑道:“我却教你个乖——你一见那黑厮,就扑倒在地上大哭,只说自己见了他太激动了!至于为什么激动,我想那黑厮就是包拯包大人转世,他也推算不出来!”
唐牛儿便“呸”了一声:“将那黑厮比作包大人,他也配?就依星主大官人所言,咱们去见那伪君子吧!”
于是西门庆带了武大郎和唐牛儿,来到宋江安歇的院落,扬声道:“公明哥哥可醒着吗?小弟西门庆求见!”
今天在聚义厅上,宋江酒喝得略有些多,唯恐早睡闹酒,因此还在坐着跟两个公人闲话。听到西门庆吆喝,赶紧起身道:“是四泉兄弟吗?且稍等,宋江马上迎接。”
穿戴好衣帽,宋江接了出来。刚跨出屋门,就猛见一条人影,直扑到自己足下,抱自己腿而哭,鼻涕眼泪,蹭了他一身。却听那人边哭边道:“宋押司,宋押司,小人……小人我想死你了……想死你了……”
宋江百般挣挫不开,只得问道:“你是哪个?”
唐牛儿听到宋江声音,想到自己受他小惠欺瞒之愚,替他顶罪牢狱之苦,恨他伪善煎熬之痛,真是悲从中来,忍不住放声大哭,一边哭一边把鼻涕浓痰都倾泄到宋江腿上去。
西门庆歉然道:“公明哥哥,这个人你也认不出来吗?他便是唐牛儿啊!在郓城县中,哥哥杀了阎婆惜,唐牛儿兄弟陷在牢中,小弟唯恐那县官将唐牛儿兄弟顶罪,坏了哥哥义气的名头,因此请托了美髯公朱仝和插翅虎雷横两位哥哥,又得尊父和四郎宋清大力之助,将他赎了出来。唐牛儿兄弟感激哥哥厚恩,今日一见,情不自禁,还望哥哥宽容。”
宋江听了,满面堆笑,便拉唐牛儿道:“兄弟,赶紧起来。你替哥哥受了半场牢狱之灾,却是苦了你了!”
唐牛儿呜咽有声,只是不放。任凭西门庆百口相劝,宋江空抓了满手的眼泪鼻涕,却哪里能扶唐牛儿起身?
西门庆等唐牛儿哭累了,见宋江也狼狈不堪的时候,才收场道:“牛儿兄弟,你死求活求的,要见公明哥哥一面,如今一面你也见了,我看你也哭得够了,不如你且回去歇息,我和公明哥哥,还有正事要谈!”
唐牛儿见好就收,勉强起身,向西门庆、武大郎和宋江行过礼后,一路哭着甩着大鼻涕去了。
宋江见唐牛儿走了,松了一口气,顾不得收拾身上的一片狼籍,先向着西门庆一揖道:“四泉兄弟,多谢你救了唐牛儿,替我宋江挽回名誉。”
西门庆还礼道:“哪里哪里!哥哥杀了阎婆惜,逃走在江湖上,因此才不知道唐牛儿兄弟失陷在囹圄里。否则以哥哥的千古义气,早已经弯回身来,去郓城县衙里投案,将唐牛儿兄弟换出来了。小弟只不过效了些微劳,何足道哉?”
宋江躬身一作揖的时候,正看到了武大郎。心中先是一惊:“世上竟有如此短矮之人!”接着又是一喜:“世上竟有比我还要短矮之人!”一时间只觉得心明眼亮,连自己那一米四七的六尺身躯,都显得伟岸了许多。
“却不知这位是……?”宋江指着武大郎问道。
西门庆拱手道:“好教公明哥哥听了欢喜。
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