第3章 祖师惊觉
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“孽…孽障！松手！”玄诚祖师疼得老脸扭曲，万载养气的功夫瞬间破功。他下意识地想板起脸呵斥，可下巴被揪着，头不得不被迫微微低下，姿势狼狈不堪。他试图用另一只手去解救自己珍贵的胡须，可那婴儿攥得死紧，小手滑溜又有劲，他生怕用力过猛伤着这小祖宗，更怕彻底激怒下方虎视眈眈的玄龙，一时间竟投鼠忌器，僵在了半空！
（本章未完，请点击下一页继续阅读）第3章祖师惊觉(第2/2页)
“噗！哈哈哈哈！”一直憋着股邪火的赤阳真人，看到自己这位向来威严端方、一丝不苟的玄诚师兄，此刻被一个奶娃娃揪着胡子、狼狈低头的模样，再也忍不住，爆发出一阵惊天动地的、充满幸灾乐祸的狂笑，“师兄！滋味如何？这新‘坐骑’的缰绳，可还趁手？哈哈哈！报应！报应啊！”他笑得前仰后合，眼泪都快飙出来了，仿佛要把刚才在玄龙那里受的憋屈一股脑全笑出来。
清风子祖师也是老脸憋得通红，肩膀一耸一耸，强忍着不敢笑出声，生怕被师兄秋后算账，只能死死咬着嘴唇，发出“噗嗤噗嗤”的漏气声。其他几位祖师的表情也是精彩纷呈，想笑不敢笑，想帮忙又不知从何下手，场面一度极其尴尬。
玄诚祖师气得脸色铁青，却又无可奈何。小婴儿可不管这些，他揪着“缰绳”，玩得不亦乐乎，小脚蹬得更欢了，嘴里还兴奋地学着刚才骑龙的样子喊着：“驾！驾驾！大马…跑！咯咯咯…！”
下方的玄龙，巨大的头颅微微歪了歪，燃烧着幽蓝火焰的龙睛里，冰冷威严之色似乎褪去了不少，取而代之的是一种…极其人性化的…看热闹的戏谑？甚至…在那深金色的竖瞳深处，玄诚祖师仿佛看到了一丝…感同身受的…同情？以及…幸灾乐祸？这孽畜！
就在玄诚祖师被揪着胡子，被师弟嘲笑，被玄龙“看戏”，陷入前所未有的窘迫境地，恨不得找个地缝钻进去，又或者干脆把这烫手的小东西丢回给下面那条幸灾乐祸的龙时——
臂弯里玩得正欢的小婴儿，动作突然毫无征兆地停了下来。
那双亮晶晶的大眼睛眨了眨，小脸上的兴奋笑容如同潮水般迅速退去。他微微蹙起了小小的眉头，粉嫩的小嘴也跟着抿了起来，喉咙里发出一种细微的、如同小兽呜咽般的“嗯…嗯…”声。
玄诚祖师心头猛地一沉！一股极其不祥的预感如同冰冷的毒蛇，瞬间缠绕上他的脊柱！这表情…这声音…前一刻揪胡子时的“咯咯”欢笑还犹在耳畔，下一刻这委屈巴巴的小模样…这熟悉的配方！这熟悉的味道！
“不…不妙！”玄诚祖师脑子里“嗡”的一声，万载修持带来的危机预感疯狂报警！他几乎能预见下一秒那足以撕裂神魂的魔音穿脑！
他下意识地想把这小祖宗稍微举远一点，或者至少调整一下姿势——
然而，晚了！
一切都发生在电光石火之间！
小婴儿那抿起的、委屈的小嘴猛地张开，粉嫩的脸颊瞬间涨得通红，小小的身体在玄诚祖师臂弯里猛地一个用力拱起！
“噗——！”
一声短促而有力的、带着浓浓奶腥气的喷气声，从小婴儿嘴里爆发出来！伴随着这声音，一股温热、粘稠、散发着浓郁奶味的、色泽可疑的白色浆糊状流体，如同被小型机括弩近距离激发，精准无比、毫无浪费地，呈扇形喷射而出！
目标：玄诚祖师那张因惊骇而微微放大的、写满“祖师威严”的脸！以及他那身象征着逍遥宗太上祖师无上尊荣的、玄青色云纹暗绣、万年冰蚕丝织就的、水火不侵、纤尘不染的——道袍前襟！
噗嗤！
温热的、带着奶腥气的“浆糊”，结结实实地糊了玄诚祖师满满当当一脸！浓稠的液体顺着他高挺的鼻梁、紧抿的嘴角、梳理得一丝不苟的白发、以及那三缕正被婴儿攥在手里的长须…肆意流淌！几滴甚至溅进了他因震惊而微微张开的嘴里，一股奇异的、带着酸味的奶腥瞬间弥漫开来！
他那身华贵无匹的玄青色道袍前襟，更是瞬间沦陷！一大片刺眼的、湿漉漉的、散发着浓郁奶酸味的污渍，如同耻辱的勋章，在万年冰蚕丝光滑的表面上迅速晕染、渗透、蔓延！
时间，在这一刻彻底凝固。
风停了。
水浪声息了。
连下方玄龙喉咙里那看热闹的咕噜声都消失了。
赤阳真人那幸灾乐祸的狂笑戛然而止，如同被一只无形的大手扼住了喉咙，张大的嘴巴足以塞进一个鹅蛋，脸上的表情定格在狂笑与惊愕的扭曲交界处。
清风子祖师老脸上的肌肉疯狂抽搐，眼珠子瞪得几乎要脱眶而出，死死盯着师兄脸上和胸前那一片狼藉，大脑一片空白。
紫霄、玉衡、枯木、灵韵…其余四位祖师的表情彻底石化，眼神空洞，仿佛目睹了开天辟地以来最不可思议、最颠覆认知、最…有辱斯文
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