第一百六十三章 我吃软饭

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    酒都喝了,誓也发了,末了才告诉我,明天要去白家。
    我都怀疑这老头子是学过兵法的,这一计叫啥?生米煮成熟饭。
    宋叹笑道:“三十六计里好像没这一计。”
    “那就是三十七计!”我黑脸道。
    宋叹附耳道:“你就干脆来了将计就计。反正你这人也脸皮厚,不在乎丢人现眼。说你是白家女婿,那你就真把自己当成白家女婿,大不了倒插门呗。反正白家有的是钱,白薇配你不是绰绰有余?等着事情成了,就来个软饭硬吃,你就成了插二代了,以后我还能在你这借点光。”
    妈蛋!我有这么厚颜无耻吗?
    再说了,我身高一米八,孔武有力,肌肉线条、脸廓棱角,要啥有啥,我像是那种吃软饭的家伙吗?
    还插二代!
    就算非要这么叫,那我也是插一代啊!
    宋叹苦口婆心道:“吃软饭没啥不好,多少人想吃还吃不着呢。等你在白家站稳了脚跟,也给我介绍个。白薇有没有什么未婚的姑姑,寡居的舅妈啥的,我不挑,只要能陪着你,我都心甘情愿。”
    “大头,够意思,患难见真情啊……”我刚想抱一抱这家伙,忽然觉得不对劲啊。这小子狗日子是不是在赚我便宜,什么叫我站稳了脚跟,把白薇的姑姑舅妈介绍给他啊。
    宋叹咧嘴一笑道:“没事,咱们之间没有那么多规矩,各交各的,我叫你兄弟,你叫我姑父……”
    “咳咳!”我俩这东拉西扯的时候,岳稚川已经又把酒杯捧起来了。
    “两位说相声呢?明天白老爷子大寿,你们可先前别在那这么贫嘴。另外,白家是个大家族,旁支宗亲就不在少数,还有白家的姑亲舅亲也都在,千万别搞砸了。”
    我恨恨的想,白薇啊白薇,你可真够绝的,这些事,不敢和我交代,让这老头代传消息。
    酒过三巡,菜过五味,吃完喝完聊了一会天,我们都各自睡去了。
    我甚至都忘记问,老爷子给我预备的是什么礼物。
    第二天早上,我在想,要不要去外面找个地方理理发,收拾收拾,不说造型吧,怎么着也得搞身像样的衣服穿穿。
    可后来想了想,还是算了吧。
    就这一身牛仔就挺好。
    咱天生丽质啊,何必闹那些花里胡哨的。
    我自由惯了的人,你让我身穿一身西装,在人群里装模狗样的我还真不习惯。
    果不其然,到了地方,全场的礼服,就我和宋叹,一个一身牛仔,另一个肥大体恤,好像是两只野驴进了绵羊群。
    “老罗,要不我回去吧!”宋叹这厮四下里一瞧,先打了退堂鼓,小声道:“留你一个在这丢脸算了。咱云城本来就不大,实在禁不住两个人丢脸。”
    我现在反倒是很是镇定。
    爱咋滴咋滴,难道不穿正装还不能吃席了?
    这时候人群闪开了一条缝隙,白薇款款朝我们走了过来。
    这小丫头片子一声白色晚礼服,既没有什么褶皱、蕾丝花边,也没什么亮片、宝石,故作光彩夺目,反倒是那股子小清新,一下子就成了人群的焦点!
    白薇走到岳稚川面前,规规矩矩喊了一声师父,然后意味深长朝我一笑,走到我面前,一把挽住了我的胳膊,顺带着还偷偷掐了我一把。
    酥的一下,就像是过了电。
    “罗大爷,对不起,借你人用一用。”
    我哼声道:“你就不怕我假戏真做?”
    “笨蛋,你以为这是拜堂成亲啊,我还怕你真入了姑奶奶的洞房?”白薇低声道:“不就是哄我爸开心,把今天蒙混过去嘛。”
    我一笑道:“那万一老爷子一眼相中了我,今晚上就要成大礼呢?”
    “切,就你?”白薇抿嘴一笑道:“不过也难说,我爸这人吧,和别人不一样。他爱吃王致和臭豆腐,喜欢用手动刮胡刀,喝茉莉花茶,吃老式的钙奶饼干,没准还真就喜欢你呢?”
    臭豆腐?手动刮胡刀?
    这哪跟哪啊,意思就是说,我是另类?
    “我怀疑你是在骂我!”
    “真不是!”白薇笑道:“我是说啊,我爸喜欢那些不华丽但绝对实用的东西。”
    “那不好意思,我不是他的菜!”我正色道:“我一向走的是偶像派。”
    白薇忍不住扑哧一笑。
    就像是夏天去撒尿,怎么干净的旱厕,都有几只有碍瞻观的蛆。
    白薇拉着我的手,一边往里走,自然就成了焦点,一双双眼睛都投了过来,这时候一男一女两个人便笑嘻嘻迎了上来。
    “薇薇,这位是……你家新请的园丁?”
    “表哥,这你就不知道了吧?这是薇薇的男……性朋友。”
    白薇落落大方,淡淡一笑道:“正好,给你们介绍一下,罗天,我的男朋友。”
    “薇薇,这……就是你要今晚带给
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